Archive for September, 2011


Just my two cents (maybe a nickel, with inflation)

Learning to crochet was not difficult for me…once I got over my fear of failure and realized that it was NOT rocket science. Although, I must admit, that my initial struggle with a crochet pattern prompted me to wish for some sort of Rosetta Stone to translate the gibberish.  But, before long, it began to make sense.  That which made no sense one day became a matter of course the next.  I dare say that now there is nothing I will not tackle.  I’m not saying that I enjoy every stitch in every pattern I crochet, but I’ve yet to find an instruction I could not follow.

Now, I am not a boastful person and my reflection here is not to inflate my worth on the planet.  I simply want to illustrate that, against many odds, I learned to do something that I always believed was beyond my grasp.  I have become proficient in a craft my mother was reluctant to share with me.  I regret she did not live long enough to see my work.  But, perhaps, it is just as well.  She was a woman of her time when gender identities were strong and intransigent.  Perhaps, it is just as well.

Because the vast majority of crocheters are women, most of the apparel patterns available are for women.  Most designers and publishers cater to the obvious majority.  Many of the new subscribers to the Men Who Crochet Yahoo group tell me, with their request to join the group, that they are looking for patterns for men or that they are interested in finding out what men want to crochet for themselves or others.  Since some of our members are designers, I find this to be an encouraging sign of good things to come.

I belong to a number of crochet groups online.  As a matter of habit, many of the listers start their posts with “hello ladies”, or some such salutation.  I used to be offended and express my outrage at being overlooked and excluded.  I would contend that it was not a major imposition to expect folks to think before they wrote in order to be inclusive.  Well, I have given up that fight.  I have been flamed into submission.  I will rest, convinced that such things will never change as long as crochet is regarded as “women’s work”.  I will instead concentrate my energies on enlisting more and more men to join us happy hookers.  It is only when more men are visible and vocal that we will be regarded among the many.  We don’t want to take over, y’all.  We just want to be one of you.


Great Response to another selective interpretation of Scripture

On her radio show, Dr Laura Schlesinger said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, which was posted on the Internet. It’s funny, as well as informative:

Dear Dr. Laura: Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God’s Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God’s Laws and how to follow them.
1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can’t I own Canadians?
2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of Menstrual uncleanliness – Lev. 15: 19-24. The problem is how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord – Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?
6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination, Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don’t agree. Can you settle this? Are there ‘degrees’ of abomination?
7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?
8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?
9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn’t we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I’m confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God’s word is eternal and unchanging.
Your adoring fan,
James M Kauffman, Ed.D. Professor Emeritus, Dept. Of Curriculum, Instruction, and Special Education University of Virginia (It would be a damn shame if we couldn’t own a Canadian).

Hookerbear, RIP!

The domain has officially expired, but, for some unknown reason, it is still being recognized by my web host. This is probably your last chance to take advantage of the pattern sale… the entire lot for $25, or 1/2 price individually. Got ’em while they’re hot. Hookerbear Creations

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